A miraculous day

I received a crazy gift from God today.

I was having a hard time. It was the last day of my second job. I came home and cried in the bathtub, barely able to breath, sobbing. I was feeling so bad, So lost.

I tried texting a few of my friends, but no one was available.

Yesterday, in a fit of sadness, I deactivated my facebook and switched to a new account, with nothing on it and no friends. I felt like if I closed the account, I think I wouldn’t feel like people were ignoring my pleas for help.

Then, in an attempt to get back to myself, I decided to join some groups online. One of these was a Pisces group. Since I know for sure that I’m a Pisces, it was a good place to start.

So back to today, I was sad, and in the bath, and I wasn’t getting any responses from friends so I went on that group and posted that I was heartbroken, hoping some of my Piscean peers would have some insight or stories or something to make me feel like I was interacting with people.

A bunch of people responded. It was wonderful, because we are all sensitive so they can kind of understand.

Someone posted a few bits of advice and shared that they understood.  Immediately I felt like this person really cared, and really understood. Even not knowing me, just a soul who faced many of the battles I did.

Crazily, like I never do, we started a whole conversation. Well it got to be that I couldn’t type it all out, everything I wanted to say, on my phone. I gave them my phone number, and they gave me theirs.

I was sitting outside where it had been thundering for some time. Now lightning strikes began as well and storm clouds rolled over. Still no rain or wind though, just a dry storm. A pent up, waiting storm. Like the feeling in my stomach for the past few months (or years). As we texted, the thunder clapped and lightning lit up the sky. I looked up, and a heron flew right over my house and off into the distance.  I never see herons. Certainly not over my house.

We got to talking about how our emotions seem to reflect or be reflected by the weather. I couldn’t text any longer. I called.

I called a complete stranger, who lived thousands of miles away. And you know what? It was just… amazing. We just started chatting right away, like we weren’t complete strangers! We both struggled with anxiety and it felt SO good to talk to someone who actually understood all the crazy-seeming nonsense that goes on in my head. Someone who listened without judgement and made sense of the madness.

People, I can’t tell you how it made me feel. We talked FOREVER and as I was saying I had to go get my kids in bed, the rain started to fall, and the storm was unleashed. Like everything that had been holding back had been released to fall back to the earth and start anew. My stomach, normally twisted in knots of anxiety, was uncoiling. Call it stress relief, call it clearing the chakras, call it whatever. I could actually physically feel the tension and fear releasing.

Just because a stranger took the time to care for and reach out to another stranger.

These moments, these weird coincidences, are life-changing.

God is good. We never have it under control. Never. But He does.